


Possibly the worst mlp fanfic

by usernamesaretoohard



Category: MLP - Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-06
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-06-23 00:25:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15594180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/usernamesaretoohard/pseuds/usernamesaretoohard
Summary: This is loosely based on Friendship is Witchcraft and running bit that Applejack was in 'the war'.Haunted by her memories of the American Civil War, Applejack tries to get on with her life in ponyville.





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

 

_Captain Jack we need more ammunition._

_Over here Captain, he’s wounded._

_Orders Captain._

_We’re being hounded Captain._

_Orders Captain. Orders._

_Captain. Captain. Captain._

 

Applejack stared at her reflection. She looked tired, that was nothing new. She looked older too now. It was only when she looked up to see Twilight Sparkle’s concerned face that she realised she’d been staring into that apple for quite a while.

 

‘I said, where do we put the full bushels?’

‘Oh, uh, over there in Big Mac’s wagon.’

 

She dropped the apple into the barrel. Twilight looked over to the wagon at the far end of the field then down at the bushel by her hooves. It suddenly looked a lot heavier now.

 

‘Are you ok?’

‘Yeah I, uh, I just want to make sure each apple is perfect you know.’

‘Ok!’ said Twilight, bright and cheery as ever.

 

_She’s so young_ Applejack thought, _she wasn’t there, she couldn’t understand_. Twilight turned her attention back to the more pressing issue of getting the full bushel across the field. Applejack turned back to her own work. She flicked her legs back behind her into the trunk of the tree and watched the apples fall. She wasn’t like Twilight; she knew what she was doing. It was a routine, like clockwork. _Like loading a gun_. She could do it with her eyes closed. But she wouldn’t close her eyes, that’s when she heard them.

Just keeping going. Knock the tree, fill the bushels, fill the cart. She filled two bushels and loaded them into the wagon. From here, she could see everyone in the orchard working, laughing. Her family, her friends. All of the ponies she held dear to her. _None of them know_. She cantered over to join Fluttershy and Rainbowdash by the stream.

 

‘Oh, um, I don’t think that’s such a good idea Rainbowdash’

‘It’ll be fine! All I gotta do is-’

 

Applejack took the harpoon gun from Rainbowdash’s hooves and placed it on the ground. Fluttershy breathed a sigh of relief. As did most of the surrounding ponies.

 

‘I don’t care what you were gonna do with that but y’all better get back to apple pickin’ or we’ll be pickin’ all night.’

 

Rainbowdash scowled but returned to her assigned station, muttering something about tyrannical leadership. _Ha!_ Applejack thought, _I could teach you something about tyrants giving orders_. But she wouldn’t. She never did. She kicked the harpoon onto her back and turned back to the rest of the field. Twilight Sparkle was pushing her bushel onto Spike’s back. He lifted his foot to take a step, wobbled, and suddenly there were apples rolling in every direction. Applejack sighed and made to go over to the pair of idiots when she heard a voice behind her.

 

‘Well if I had have known you were going to be armed I would have brought my colt.’

 

Rarity. Why was she here? Couldn’t she leave her be? Applejack turned and watched Rarity’s eyes scan up from her hooves to her hat, then back to the harpoon gun. _Go back to your drawing room and your medals_ thought Applejack, _leave the hard work to the peasants_. She sighed.

 

‘Thanks for joinin’ us Rarity.’

‘Well, I like to do my bit for the uh-’ she scanned the field

‘For your friends?’

‘Well, quite.’

 

Applejack led her over to join the others. Rarity’s eyes remained fixed on the harpoon gun. _It’s a weapon, Rarity, not that you’d know, you never fired a shot._ The others welcomed Rarity and she began tenderly picking up apples one at a time, wiping each one clean as she did. Applejack turned, she wouldn’t spend a second more than she had to in the company of _one of_ _them_. She was almost away when she heard;

 

‘Oh Applejack. You should put that thing away before some pony gets hurt.’

 

Applejack gritted her teeth.

 

‘The war is over you know.’


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

 

‘No no no no! None of these will do!’

 

Rarity dropped the offending ribbons to the table and turned her attention back to the mannequin. The sienna red dress was screaming out for a blue sash. But not just any blue. Cerulean, azure, ultramarine….no. This needed something different

 

Something poking out of the edge of her wardrobe caught her eye. A deep blue sleeve. Cobalt blue. Yes, that’s what it needed. She turned back to the table. Nothing. Damn.

 

She stepped over trimmings of sienna red fabric over to the wardrobe. She had intended to tuck the sleeve back in but something made her pull the whole garment out. She smoothed over the fabric with her hoof, delicately tracing over the epaulets and down over the sash. They didn’t make parade coats like this anymore. Even on the darkest day, holding Fort Clops, surrounded by the full force of the ponyfederate army, she was comforted by their far superior uniforms. Victory wasn’t easy, but she always knew it was inevitable. The ponyleteriat would never accept leaders in mottled grey coats.

 

‘Watcha doing?’

 

Rarity reached for the nearest projectile and span around to meet the intruder. Pinky Pie stared at her blankly through the open window, unphased by the sewing scissors pointed at her head.

 

‘Pinky! You mustn’t sneak up on people like that. It is most impolite.’

‘What’s that?’ Pinky looked down at the uniform

 

‘That, Pinky’ she said, gently placing the scissors back on the bench ‘is my parade uniform. I-’

‘Oooh! When’s the parade? I love parades! Can you make me a parade uniform? With sparkles and glitter? Can you? Can you please?’

‘Heavens no! A parade uniform is-’

 

She stopped. There was no point. If she carried on she would have to explain the whole darn war to her. Besides Pinky was too young. Thankfully, she’d already turned her attention to the pile of ribbons on the table. Rarity returned the coat to the corner of the wardrobe and gently closed it. Pinky had somehow tangled all of the ribbons into a large knot by the time Rarity got back to her sewing table.

 

‘So do what do I owe the pleasure Pinky Pie?’

‘Oh uh, yes! Twilight Sparkle sent me. We’re having a party at the orchard to celebrate the end of the harvest!’

 

Tea and cake with the enemy, how delightful. Still. One must keep up appearances.

 

‘Yes, of course. I’d be delighted. You go on ahead dear, I’ll catch up’

 

Pinky Pie trotted out of the house, blissfully unaware of the building frustration in her friend. What would her general think if she was still here? A Pony-Union Major General sipping apple juice with a Ponyfederate. At least she wasn’t a general, that really would be unforgivable.

 

Rarity sighed and began to pull at the tangled web of the wrong blues. Within two minutes they were all laid out in a neat row, within ten minutes the floor was swept and the last of the sienna red trimmings were in the scraps basket. She looked at her spotless home. No more excuses. Time to go.

 

She pulled a light purple scarf out of the drawer and wrapped it around her neck. _Back into the field Major._


	3. Chapter Three

Applejack hated parties. Besides, why were they celebrating? Two days of harvesting and the town ponies thought it was all over. The apples still needed to be separated, some to be sold, the rest to be juiced and bottled. The real work started now. But the ponies wanted a party and so, here they were.

 

‘Look everybody! Rarity’s here!’ Squealed Pinky Pie

 

_Oh great, just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse._

 

‘Hey y’all, I’m gonna close shut them barn doors, can’t have the apples gettin’ chilly!’

 

No one was listening. They were too busy crowding around to admire Rarity’s new scarf. Applejack trotted down towards the barn, when she reached it she heard a shrill annoying voice.

 

_‘Some pony once told me the world is gonna roll me, I ain’t the sharpest tool in the she-ed’_

 

She peered into the barn to see Spike moving apples one by one into the larger bushels. A teetering pile of smaller bushels towered over him. This was Twilight’s job. She said she’d finished hours ago. Applejack sighed, she should help him.

 

_‘She was lookin kinda dumb with her hoof and her –uh- hoof in the shape of an L on her fore-head’_

 

Actually, she thought, he’s probably fine.

 

Applejack quietly stepped backwards and turned towards the party. When she trotted back the ponies were still discussing Rarity’s scarf. Bloody horseoisie.

 

‘Well darling, I was in Ponis* for fashion week and I saw this gorgeous shade on a hideous pair of legwarmers but I knew it would make such an elegant scarf so I hunted down the designer and-’

 

‘Where do you get off?’

 

The ponies turned in amazement to see Applejack roll her eyes. Rarity chuckled.

 

‘Applejack, darling. Thank you for the invitation. I do so love to see what the working ponies get up to. It will certainly help when I run for mayor next month.’

 

Applejack couldn’t take it anymore.

 

‘If you think any pony is gonna vote for you, y’all got another thing coming. One day we will seize the-‘

 

‘APPLEJACK’, Twilight interrupted

 

Applejack and Rarity turned to her, both seething. This was going to be an all-out fight if she didn’t do something to change the subject.

 

‘Um, uh’ she looked around desperately until her eyes settled on the barn door ‘Applejack silly, you forgot the barn door! Let me get that for you.’

 

‘Twilight no!’ Applejack shouted, but it was too late. Her horn was pointed at the barn door.

 

They heard the door slam and then a crash. Applejack shuddered.

 

‘Whoopsie! I hope I didn’t crush too many apples’

 

Applejack cantered down to the barn. Rarity followed, she’d seen the look in Applejack’s eyes before. In the eyes of her fellow soldiers. They opened the barn door and dug through the apples until they found him.

 

It was too late.

 

They stared at the lifeless dragon in front of them for some time. Neither of them cried, they’d seen too many bodies for that. Rarity was the first to speak.

 

‘How do we tell Twilight?’

 

‘I don’t know’


End file.
